What do you do when you discover you’ve been following the wrong path for too long? I know this is not what I signed up for, but I don’t know how to adjust my sails. I’d like to start doing what I really want. Please help.
– Wandering in Westminster
Dear Wandering in Westminster,
Decide what you want and shift your focus into something new. Don’t beat yourself up because of the road you just traveled. Everything has purpose. The only way to be happy is to listen to your heart and soul and trust it will always lead you in the right direction. Let go of what was and open to where you are now. Everything will become clear as you release and allow yourself to want what you want. Then all you have to do is enjoy.
I have been trying to make some changes in my life for a long time, but I don’t seem to be getting anywhere. I really want to lose weight and feel better in my body. I feel tired all the time, and my results don’t seem to stick. I’ll lose 10 pounds then gain it back. I want to end this vicious cycle, but I also think, “what’s the point?” Why bother if I’m just going to gain it back and have to do it all over again? I think it’d be easier to just give up.
– Wishing for Weight Loss in Westchester
Dear Wishing for Weight Loss in Westchester,
Don’t give up! Sometimes I think when people are having so much trouble with something it’s because they are trying too hard. You probably know what to do to lose weight since you’ve done it before. Now maybe you just need to relax a little bit, and be easy on yourself as you do it again. This time when you feel yourself starting to get stressed or feel a slip backwards, just lightly catch yourself. You’ve been there before – so you know the spot. Breathe, relax, and gently encourage yourself forward. We all do this, so don’t think you’re the only one. It’s a common part of change – one step forward, two steps back. You just learn how to catch yourself in that spot where it gets intense, and you want to revert back to your old ways. One new thought in the right direction will keep you moving forward. Decide to breakthrough! (and know you’re worthy of the breakthrough!!)
Pretty soon you’ll learn how to manage yourself on a regular basis, sensing the slipping points and redirecting yourself. Believe it or not, your mind has a lot of control here. See if you can notice the dialogue that comes up during the hard times – that’s really what needs to change.
Like every other change, the ability to see yourself in a positive light will help push through the hard stuff and sustain the new you!
Remember how awesome you are! Now prepare your mind again for success. You can do it!
I’m cheering you on!
I’m ready to move into a new phase in my life. It’s been a long time coming, probably should’ve done it years ago, but I’m ready now. I’m wondering how to make it through in one piece coming out on the other side feeling alive and free. I don’t normally handle change well, and all parts of my life are shifting. Please help me through!
– Shifting in Shelbysville
Dear Shifting in Shelbysville,
I know it’s scary, but you’re getting ready for the one of the greatest adventures of your life!
That’s my first piece of advice – See it as an adventure you are creating.
The key to making it through the middle is to let go. Trust the change.
Keep your eyes focused forward, because there’s so much ahead of you.
Make sure to remind yourself why this is important to you. You may need that reminder more than a time or two. 🙂
When life starts moving really fast, remind yourself you can never keep up with everything, and you never have to. Stay strong and focused, but also let go. That’s a tricky balance for some, but it’s how you’ll come out feeling alive and free. The freedom’s in the letting go. Just keep moving with it the best you can, and when you need a break – take one!
I tell you it’s all in the pacing!
Happy trails to you! I think you are going to be great.
p.s. the first step sometimes is all it takes to open up a brand new life. I believe in you!
I have trouble letting myself have what I want. It’s frustrating. I know who I am and what I want to do, but I struggle with this idea that I’m not good enough – so why try? Can you help me with this? I miss my life.
– Missing Out In Montana
Dear Missing Out in Montana,
You are good enough. We all are. So just brush those words out of your vocabulary. Okay?
I see this happen all the time with adults. You try, and try, and try, and try, and then you’re tired. You make it so much harder than it is. When all you really have to do is show up with an open heart, and have so much fun with whatever you’re doing. Everything starts working out when you enjoy yourself. It’s like people just can’t wait to give you more, because your joy is contagious.
So, get rid of the “I’m not good enough” lie. You are love, and you are light. Start acting in line with that truth, and your life will begin to change.
When you try to tell yourself those lies, catch yourself in the act and change your mind.
Let your new ‘good enough’ behavior follow.